The Pregnancy Journey

Living so far from my mother and sisters during pregnancy has not been ideal. In the early months of severe "morning sickness" I would have given just about anything to have my mom cook an occasional meal for me (actually for Nathan) or just give me a sympathetic hug. As pregnancy became more pleasant in the 2nd trimester, I would have loved to be able to sit and chat with my sisters about the excitement of it all, ask their advice, and let them see my belly progression. : ) And I'd love to be with them all now as I await the arrival of our little one and want so badly to have them be some of the first to meet him.

But it wasn't in God's plan for me to be with my family during this time of life. So instead of spending time together, we've been filling the miles between us with phone calls, skype dates, and sharing pictures. I'm so thankful for their love and constant joy and excitement for us despite being so far away.

Here are a few of the pictures I've shared with my family over the past few months. Pregnancy has been a long, challenging, joyful and exciting journey that will (hopefully) soon come to an end as we meet our little miracle.

8 Weeks

28 Weeks

18 Weeks

Belly comparison at 34 Weeks

38 Weeks

Titus' things all ready to take to the hospital!

The Springtime Promise

I sit in the stillness of the early morning, in the comfort of my living room, drinking in the beauty of the snow-capped mountains which appear to be just outside my window. Winter is fading...slowly...and every day we see a bit more the promise of Spring. 

The sun is coming over the Eastern horizon now, illuminating the mountains in the West. The new light exposes their unfathomable depth and detail. Creation truly does sing the joy of the Father.

How my heart wants Winter to be replaced by a permanent Spring. How I want the Son to come today, lighting up the darkness and replacing this cold world with warmth and joy. I want Him to expose the beauty of the Earth as we have never seen before. I want to see The Promise fulfilled. I want to see the Kingdom come. I want to see Jesus. 

"Let the heavens be glad, and let the earth rejoice; let the sea roar, and all that fills it; let the field exult, and everything in it! Then shall all the trees of the forest sing for joy before the Lord, for he comes, for he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness, and the peoples in his faithfulness."

Psalm 96:11-13

The Winds of Change

Life is full of changes. The winds of change blow soft and subtle some moments and then howl and swirl the next. 

Pregnancy is one of those howling and swirling moments of change. I wake up every day looking and feeling different than the day before. My belly's grown bigger, my hair thicker, the contractions stronger, the bladder smaller, and the emotions feebler. I have new decisions to make, new priorities to align, a new role to fulfill, a new person for whom I'm responsible. Life is in the process of changing drastically for me. Some changes have already come, and others will come now at any moment. Each of these changes, though difficult, are sweet sweet blessings coming as a result of God's beautiful gift to me and Nathan. 

Though I am so thankful for our coming child and each of the changes that come along with him, this season of change plants the seed of fear in my soul. With all the physical changes comes the fearful question, "Am I still beautiful?" With the entrance into motherhood comes the fearful question, "Will I know what to do?" With the many new decisions to make comes the fearful question, "Will I make the right choice?" And on and on...

With a fearful soul I am always tempted to run to my husband, seeking affirmation and confidence in his love and steadfastness. But I know in my mind (so much more than in my heart) that Nathan has such limited resources to offer me - he is only a man. I know that peaceful rest will only come when I run to my God, seeking that affirmation and confidence in His perfect love and faithfulness toward me. I was reminded in Hebrews 4 this morning that I can confidently draw near to the throne of grace receiving mercy and finding grace in my time of need. How beautiful, how satisfying to know that God is sovereign over every change coming my way and so graciously provides His Word so I can face every change without fear. How I treasure the Scriptures and their Author today. 

Reader, surely you face some fear of change and uncertainty even now. Might I encourage you to draw nearer to the throne of grace and read deeper into the Word of truth? May you find rest for your soul there. 

"Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Hebrews 4:14-16